"Nowhere Man" new from Albert Goldman?

I'll try to keep this brief. People have wanted to probe the mind of Marcus Arelius. I guess the question is if scientists and psychologist endeavored to Prove my mind - Would they find anything there? We all know Albert Goldman comes up with these trash piece biographies on people. Although these have their recurring biases. Goldman, for instances, seems obsessed with the idea that his subjects are all suffering from Mother fixations. There was a Startrek episode where Mr. Data made some bad decision and Captain Piccard says to Data, "You know they are going to strip you down to your wires to find out what went wrong". So the question remains, "What is it other people see about me that I don't see in myself?" Well when I was younger, particularly in grammar school I was always laying mind trips on my friends and "trying to bring them into my world". One might say I had a bit of a Jim Jones personality. Some say that the thing you hate the worst about other people is the thing you really hate about yourself. I was a guy who was always "making plans". My philosophy in life seems to be "If one plan fails, have a slew of other back up plans you can immediately go with". I used to like to draw car designs. I had plans for houses, plans for cities, plans for amusement parks. I did these fish eye "circerama" drawings like the theater in the round at Disneyland. In January of 1970 I forayed into the fourth dimension and somewhat successfully was able to depict that. The proper Euclidian term for this is Poly-dimensional space. Many convictions I hold firmly, but in other areas, I haven't a clue. In 1965 there were a lot of cultural developements I just hadn't made up my mind about. There was this whole Hippy scene that broke on America around late spring of 1965 with groups like Sonny and Cher. I remember when the Kinks were first on TV and my brother, Al remarks "They're worse then women" and I have the remark on tape. I wasn't sure how I felt about what I regarded as "overly sensual song lyrics". There were Dylan lyrics working their way into songs such as "All I really want to do is baby be friends with you" and "Chimes of Freedom". My bias was more tword traditional song lyrics where there was some kind of a moral center and there were good guys and bad guys along the lines of these "Romantic soap opera" lyrics particularly of the girl groups such as the Chiffons, the Angels, Leslie Gore and the Cherrels. These opperated more from an "I'm right and you're a fool" vantage point. Also there at this time was the Jeane Dixon "end of the world" stuff making its way into popular culture, and even Harry Green got into the act with one sermon saying "Cultural progress is not an inevitable thing". And even back then there was creep into the comon culture this Sylvia Brown outlook of death being a place where we need to "go to the light" and once in the Light we will experiance a "Whole new Beginning". The sort of thing that Thom Hartman believes in. I figure "Well what the heck. Run it up the flag pole and see if anybody salutes". I wasn't sure how I felt about the Viet Nam war. I had heard the songs. There was "Eve of Destruction" and a lot of Donavin songs. I didn't particularly agree with any of these sentaments at the time feeling they were reaching over-blown conclusions. Of course a lot of my humor reaches into strange areas. Some people talk behind other people's backs. But at least they are real people. So I thought "What if you talked behind an Imaginary person's back". That would be a new twist. I have had this fear that in the Thousand Year Reign of Jesus, if they did these Rush Limbaugh song update things- - like the condom update with "Up, up, and Away" that the song they would pick out for me would be "I'm Looking Through You". Certain things I find particular humor in. For instance- some Born Again right winger thinking he has some really important Moral point to make, only to get tangled up in his words and trip all over himself. This joke I fell about Rick Perry in the next file was inspired by a "Mama's Family' episode where Iola tells Thelma a joke, and Thelma decides to use that joke at an 'Open microphone night" about going to the Supermarket. But Thelma trips over the punch line and there is dead silence. I tend to be a person with his own ideas of right and wrong. All of my poetry lyrics have a definite Point to them. I guess what I find troubling about the poetry of other mental patients is that it seems to me alltogether too unstructured, too subjective, and without any point to it and alltogether irrelivent. One problem I have in communacating with others is that I tend to take leaps forward in my train of logic, leaving out certain transition sentenses. I'm too many steps ahead of my hearer. But I'd be happy to go back and back-track if they would allow me. I've always been fascenated with math. But in Geometry I ran into the trouble not stating proofs reasoning "It's obvious - - why do I need to Prove it?" I tend to be suspicious of people who won't answer a simple, direct question. I hope this little piece has been helpful for at least some of my readers. This will be the top posting for only a few minutes.